My Most Important Life Lessons

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I sat on my backyard swing last night enjoying the astonishing beauty of the summer sky. Journal in hand, I began to think about the wisdom that I have acquired in my many years of living. I realize that my life has been a sacred journey of gathering wisdom and understanding how to best live well in the world. I know I have alot more to learn but I am so grateful for what life has taught me.


1. Let go of things you cannot change.

Ask yourself, what can I do about this? If it seems there is something you can do, do it. If the answer is nothing, say a heartfelt prayer and get on with the business of living.

2. Change what you can.

Your thoughts, your behaviors and your actions--that is about it!

3. Do not take things personally.

If you are treated rudely, it usually isn’t about you but the other person’s pain or wounds. You don’t have to be a victim.

4.Heal your wounds.

If you find you are often offended and unhappy, look inside for what is being triggered and heal these wounds.

5.Feed your soul.

Spend time often doing what you love. This will bring you much happiness!


6.Connect with others.

Smile at people in the grocery store. Comment on someone’s baby or flowers or dog. Form a book group or a women’s group. Call a friend for lunch. Invite a neighbor for dinner.


7. Kindness is golden.

Kindness not only brings joy to others but expands our own heart. Kindness to yourself is very important.

8. Do not make assumptions.

You can build a whole story out of why you think someone is doing what they are doing. It is a waste of your time and energy

9. Listen with your whole heart.

This is one of the greatest gifts you can give another human being.

10. Accept yourself with all your beauty, flaws and human frailties.

When you accept yourself the way you are you are free to make changes.

11. Listen to your gut.

Check inside when making a decision about anything. If something just doesn't feel right, pay attention to that feeling.

12. Know what you stand for.

Get clear on your principles and beliefs. These will be your guide in making many important life decisons.

13. Appreciate what you have.

When you live in appreciation the universe will give you even more.

14. Allow yourself to feel your feelings.

This is very freeing and allows you to live more in a state of flow.

15. Like attracts like.

Positive thoughts attract positive things, experiences and people. Negative thoughts attract negativity into your life.

16. Simple things are best.

When I look back at my life it is always the times with family and friends, the games, the laughter, the joy that we shared that I remember most.

17. It is the love you have shared with others that really matters.

Live as if to live and to love are the same.

18. Forgive.

Forgiveness allows the posion of hatred to leave your body, mind and soul and to live in a state of peace and joy. It helps when we realize that most people are doing the best they can with what the resources and knowledge they have.

19. Just do it!

This applies to applying for the job,making that dreaded phone call,going out for a run when you are tired or booking a trip to Italy.

20. Look for the good in others.

Why not? If I can see the loveliness in someone else...they begin to see it in themselves.

These life lessons guide me in my everyday life in countless ways. I am sure I will add more and more to the list as the years go by.

I would love if you added your gems to this list. I am sure they are beautiful.

From my heart to yours,
Brenda

The Courage to Emerge with Tess Marshall of The Bold Life

Tess Marshall's blog, The Bold Life is full of passion, joy and wisdom--just like Tess! Tess is a gifted writer, coach and public speaker. I know you will feel much bolder and ready to take on the world when you read this empowering article. A big thank you for my new friend Tess for sharing her gifts with the world and for being a guest on my blog!


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” –Anais Nin

Do you have a dream that is big, scary and seems impossible? You may even feel the world is against you and everyone else gets the breaks. Don’t allow your dreams to fade away or die out of fear. Don’t take your talent to your grave.

I believe you have what it takes and I think you’re amazing, and what I think …you’re a million times more! I believe in our awesome universe anything can happen, any place, any time, when you show up and participate in life.

What to do when you fear your possible dream:

“Smile, breathe and go slowly.” Thich Nhat Hanh

Live a moment-to-moment life. Nothing is impossible to believe or accomplish one moment at a time. In the present moment fear fades away leaving room for faith to flourish.

In this moment your gifts and talents are unfolding. Listen as your heart is stirred by joyful whispers only you can follow. When you hear your dream calling, fling the door open and invite your future inside.

“The time has come to turn your heart into a temple of fire. Your essence is gold hidden in dust. To reveals its splendor you need to burn in the fire of love.” – Rumi

Choose to feel radiantly alive. Breathe into what challenges you. Breathe from you solar plexus and know that the universe is conspiring to bring you all that you need to grow into your dream. Trust the dream in your heart.

“You, yourself, are the arbiter of your own destingy.” Emma C. Hopkins

Choose health. Make healthy choices including daily doses of fruits, vegetables and exercise. When you choose to awaken every cell in your body, your energy vibrates on the frequency of miracles.

“Whatever we do lays a seed in our deepest consciousness, and one day that seed will grow.” – Sakyoung Mipham

Create something new every day. Write the next chapter in your book, dance, cook, garden, design or decorate. Your creativity fans the Divine spark that connects to the right people, places and things. Seek a connection to someone who can and will take you to the next level.

“Faith in yourself will make despair disappear.” –Frank Tyger

Have faith in yourself and in your path. Act on Divine inspiration. Go with the flow. Live from the place that the world is better because you are here. Be contagious, radiate energy that makes others want what you have. Consciously create your world. Color it bright, outline it in bold!

“I still get wildly enthusiastic about little things…I play with leaves. I skip down the street and run against the wind.” –Leo F. Buscalia

Partake in the Sacred Yes Factor. Be spontaneous! Don’t over think things. Your ego wants predictability. It’s what drives you to watch the same television show, eat the same food for breakfast and take the same route to work. Your soul wants spontaneity. Take a risk, dare to look foolish or silly. Say yes to life, work, play and new beginnings. Learn to love and invite curiosity, fun and even change into your life.

“People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.” – Thich Nhat Hanh

Stretch beyond your normal boundaries. Do the unthinkable, believe in the unimaginable, and go against the crowd and common view. Trust. Surrender. Be free. Connect with the awe inspiring majesty and rhythm of life.

“Blaze with the fire that is never extinguished.” Luisa Sigea

Be passionate. French philosopher and author of The Poetics of Space, Gaston Bachelard, states that three factors are required for living a life of spontaneity and passion: intensity, intimacy, and immensity. Be animated, inspired, enlightened and illuminated by music, books, nature, children and art. Allow your life to be an expression of joy. Allow life to sweep you along the path others fear to go.

“Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot.” D. H. Lawrence

Get out there and makes some noise. I recently decided to reignite my professional speaking career after a three year hiatus. I found a great coach and asked him to hold me accountable. I joined Toastmasters to be with like minded people. I put a speaking page on my blog. My first gig is coming up next month. When I committed, my dream reached out and took me by the hand.

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” — Albert Einstein

Stand in gratitude with a strong appreciation of yourself. Radiate your brilliance, intuition and some kind of wonderful. Be swept away by your own genius. You have the Divine in your DNA. You are here to play a part in creating a world that blesses everyone and profits all.

Do you feel drawn to something? What is one thing you could do that would make the biggest difference in your life?


Tess Marshall is the mover and shaker, at www.TheBoldLife.com, where she’ll hold you accountable for being the boldest you’ve ever been in every area of your life! What would you do if you were 10 times bolder? You can sign up for her RSS feed and receive her updates or follow her on Twitter
www.TheBoldLife.com
"Inspiration for Fearless Living"
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Speaking Information: theboldlife.com/ispeak/

Bring Your Child Out to Play

Ten Ways to Be More Like a Child

All children are artists. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up. - Pablo Picasso

1. Be curious.

Look at things as if seeing them for the first time. Wonder how birds build their nests. Wonder where squirrels sleep in the winter. Be curious about people. When you look at life with curious eyes and ears…you judge less and love more.

2. Be yourself.

When you worry what others think about you, you lose your natural spontaneity and aliveness. Just enjoy being your beautiful authentic self!

3. See beauty everywhere.

Look for beauty in everyone and everything. It is there in the everydayness of life. Look for it in flowers, trees, birds, children on a swing, lovers holding hand.

4. Believe in miracles.

There are miracles everywhere just waiting to be enjoyed! Have fun becoming a miracle hunter.

5. Be playful.

Blow bubbles. Dance in your living room. Have an ice cream party. Go on a bike ride. Play charades. Run through the sprinkler. Sing to your hearts content.

6. Live in the moment.

When you dwell in the past you get depressed and when you worry about the future you get anxious. So, really the best place to be is HERE. NOW. And you do that by noticing what is around you.

7. Create something!

Use the skills you have to make something you love. When we are busy creating something we can not be unhappy. Creating beautiful moments counts too!

8. Spend time in nature.

Nature comes bearing so many gifts. When I walked today and saw the trees I marveled and how easily they bend with the wind. As I passed our neighborhood creek, I watched as the flow of water. I realized that I can be more like the trees and the flowing water.

9. Be spontaneous!

When you feel the urge to do something –just do it! When you wait too long, you miss opportunities to live!

10. Express yourself.

When a child is sad or mad or glad…he or she lets you know with laughter, tears or words. Feelings kept inside keep us trapped and down. If it isn’t appropriate at the time to sharethere is always your journal, a trusted friend or a therapist.

Love Made Visible

So much to worry about. So little we can do. Sometimes all we can do is to send love out to whoever we are worried about. Hopefully, we can be there with a helping hand and an outstretched arm.

Love is an emotion, a feeling, a verb, a noun and with an "ing" it is even an adverb. Love makes the wold go 'round. Love enriches us, revitalizes us, expand us. It fills us with warmth and joy.

Everyday we can choose to be a loving presence. We can be a beacon of light that reaches out and touches the world in a positive, empowering and healing way. We have the sublime power to affect the quality of the day for the people we come in conact with. And the wonderful thing about this is that like a pebble thrown into a pond, we never know how far our love will travel.

I recall this winter when my husband and I woke up to discover that my neighbor Stuart (thank you Stuart!) had cleared our sidewalk of the snow that had fallen overnight. What a great way to start the day. It warmed our hearts and filled us with good feelings that not only affected us all day long but also everyone we came in contact with.

So today, I focus not so much on romantic love .. . although that is an amazing and wonderful thing. Today, I am thinking more about loving-kindness. The kind of love that gets joy our of making life easier for others.

The kind of love that that asks the clerk in the drustore how her day is going.

The kind of love that treks through a snowy backyard to make sure the birds are feed.

The kind of love that can sit with people who are sick or hurting and just be with them.

The kind of love that not only feeds the neighborhood stray cat but builds a little red house for him too sleep in. (shout out to Sharon and Tom!)

The kind of love you feel while making a pot of soup knowing how warm and happy the soup will make your family.

The kind of love that rushes right over to a friend who has experienced a loss with a box of kleenex and a bag of M and M's.

The kind of love that listens, really listens with an open heart to a friend who needs you.

The kind of love that looks beyond someone's appearance or the kind of car they drive and only notices the person the quality of the person's heart.

The kind of love that sends a card of encouragement or a phone call to someone who is having a hard time.

The kind of love that volunteers at the local food bank.

The kind of love that visit the elderly woman next door who lives alone with a container of soup in hand.

Life can be stressful, hard, scary and sometimes unfair. But what if in the midst of all this .. .we just decided to give love wherever we go? What if we moved beyond our problems and asked the barista at the coffee shop about her new baby and she would light up knowing that we cared about her? What if we waved people into our lane in bad traffic? What if we went up to a lonely looking person at a party and asked him about himself? What if we were all beaming beacons of love and light? What would it be like if we all lived this way? For in the end, I am very sure that it is love that will save us.

I infuse everything with love today.
I see the best in others.
I see the best in myself.
I am in total harmony with everyone today.
Love operates in all my relationships.
I allow my love to flow freely. My supply of love is endless.
It is a joy to spread love and kindness to everyone I meet today.

Time to Shed

Photo by Jeff Williams

Shedding

In Spring many animals shed their fur. Because I am not a furry animal, I can only imagine how the excess fur begins feel heavy and cumbersome. Such freedom it must be for them to feel more lightness in their being! Joy! Delight! Present Moment living!

What about you?

Isn't time for you to think about shedding things that feel cumbersome and heavy?

What about old beliefs that keep you small and stuck?

What about the judgments you put on others and yourself?

What about negative thoughts that keeps you from enjoying life fully?

What about some ancient grudges that weigh heavily on your heart and soul?

What about the critical voice in your head that tells you you are not good enough?

What about old habits that are not working for you?

What about anything that just doesn't fit with who you are?

Spring. Time to shed. Time to take inventory. Time to Spring Clean. Time for you to blossom into who you really are!

Your Magnificence

When I see clients in my office being so hard on themselves, I tell them that I wish they could see themselves through my eyes. They would see such beauty and courage and magnificence.

I think if all people could see themselves as a spark of the divine . . . the whole world would be humming a beautiful song of peace.

So, I dedicate this to all of you . . . whose time has come to open up to your full beautiful selves!
Look into the mirror and read this to yourself . . . and just watch how your life changes! When you love yourself . . . everything falls into place.

From my heart to yours,
Brenda

Embrace Your Magnificence
A Poem for all Women Who Ever Doubt their Own Magnificence

You are music and song and laughter.
You are a shinning star on a perfectly clear night.
You are the sun after a long winter.
You are compassion and strength and vitality.
The trees bow to you when you walk by.
The flowers smile.
Every blade of grass celebrates the beauty of who you are.
And who you are yet to be.
Your life is a sacred journey.
Your gentleness is your strength.
Your strength is your gentleness.
And as you walk your path,
You are writing the story of your life.
Letting go of what no longer serves you.
And living with courage, strength, dignity, beauty, wisdom and always love.
Wherever you walk, love walks too.